Healing Shame and Guilt: The Developmental Roots of Chronic Shame and Guilt and How the NeuroAffective Relational Model (NARM) Can Help You Heal and Reconnect

An innovative, trauma-informed approach to resolving chronic shame and guilt

Shame and guilt are core emotions that can significantly limit our lives: They diminish our capacity for intimacy, trust, and connection. They fuel anxiety. They contribute to relationship struggles and amplify issues at work. And yet, we may not even be aware of the self-shaming habits that cause our distress!

In this book, therapists Laurence Heller, PhD, and Stephan K. Niederwieser provide practical tools for identifying and treating chronic shame using the NeuroAffective Relational Model (NARM). Part 1 of the book explains how guilt and shame are not actually emotions, but rather should be seen as experiences that take root in our brains and bodies. Heller and Niederwieser show how shame is learned in childhood and processed as we grow up, emphasizing that shame has nothing to do with who we truly are.

Part 2 of the book—designed for therapists and clinicians—provides an in-depth, practical guide for addressing chronic shame using the NARM approach. Originally designed for treating C-PTSD or developmental trauma, NARM identifies and strengthens our core drive for connection and healing. Going far beyond self-affirmations or boosting esteem, the NARM approach to overcoming chronic shame targets the roots rather than just the symptoms, helping us truly shed shame, develop self-confidence, and find inner peace.